The Father Difference
This podcast is about helping dads become better fathers.
It’s for dads who want to make a big difference in their kids’ lives (and be the best dads they can be) and want their children to have a loving and present father to help them.
It’s the reason we call it The Father Difference.
When God the Father makes a difference in us, we can make the same difference in our children's lives.
Imagine being the father God desires you to be, actively contributing to your children's dreams and future. Being a dad in their life story is crucial, and I believe it’s your most important role in life.
It only takes one Loving Father to change the course of a family for generations - and one perfect heavenly Father to begin the process in us.
We will post new podcast shows weekly.
It is our hope that The Father Difference will equip you to become the father you were meant to be.
I have coached and equipped men for 34 years in 14 countries.
Will you Join Me?
Praying for you - Ed McGlasson
The Father Difference
Identity Crisis: Navigating the Shifting Relationship With Your Growing Child
Have you ever felt your identity slipping away as your once-adoring child transforms into a boundary-testing teenager? That profound shift when your sweet little one who hung on your every word now questions, challenges, or even rejects your guidance can leave you wondering not just how to parent effectively, but who you are when your role seems to be changing beneath your feet.
This episode dives deep into one of motherhood's most challenging transitions: maintaining connection with your changing child while preserving your own sense of self. Pastor Ed McGlasson offers a paradigm-shifting perspective on motherhood that transcends traditional parenting advice. Rather than focusing solely on techniques to manage your child's behavior, he illuminates how securing your own identity creates the foundation for authentic connection with your evolving child.
"Children need a lighthouse when the storm is raging around them," McGlasson explains, painting a powerful image of what steadfast motherhood looks like amid adolescent turbulence. This metaphor captures the essence of effective parenting during seasons of change—remaining steadfast not because you're controlling outcomes, but because you're anchored in something deeper than your children's responses to you.
Drawing from spiritual wisdom and practical experience as both a parent and counselor to countless families, McGlasson reveals how mothers can distinguish between their identity and their role, creating space for both authentic connection and healthy boundaries. You'll discover specific prayers and mindset shifts that help you remain effective even when parenting feels like navigating uncharted waters.
Whether you're currently navigating the choppy waters of parenting a teenager, preparing for those years ahead, or reflecting on your journey with now-adult children, this episode offers transformative insights into how motherhood can be both profoundly influential and deeply fulfilling—not despite your child's changes, but through them.
Ready to be the parent or grandparent you’ve always dreamed of becoming? Subscribe and Tune into my podcast each week, and check out my resources, heartfelt encouragement, and practical tools to help you make a lasting impact on the ones you love most. Click this link below:
https://www.thefatherdifference.com/links
Thank you. How much impact do you think a mother can have on her child's life, not just today, but for generations to come? Welcome everyone to our special live show the Difference a Mother Makes. Today, we're talking about the influence, sacrifices, strength and the unseen ways moms shape the future. This show is to celebrate you and to be reminded of just how important your role is in the lives of your children. So, whether you're a new mom, seasoned mom, single mom, or even here to honor a mother in your life, this show is for you.
Speaker 1:We'll dive deep into the ways moms shape futures, nurture hearts and create legacies. Nurture hearts and create legacies. So don't miss this chance to be inspired, uplifted and reminded of the profound role you play that makes a profound difference in your children's lives. We're thrilled you're joining us because we have something truly powerful lined up. It's my honor to introduce the man who will guide us through this incredible conversation. He's a former NFL player, now pastor, author, father, husband and an amazing speaker who has dedicated his life to sharing the transforming love of God through the power of family. So grab a cup of tea, get comfortable and let's dive in. Now let's welcome Pastor Ed McGlashan.
Speaker 2:Let's welcome Pastor Ed McGlasson. Hey, welcome. We had a crazy glitch today. The actual service that we use, streamyard, evidently had a worldwide break with connecting through Google, which is part of the hosting platform that hosts this. So, anyway, I think it was all because they didn't want me to do this show. I'm so grateful to be with you Today. We're talking about my child is changing. We're talking about my child is changing and I don't know how to reach him.
Speaker 2:I get that question all the time from moms where they're in the midst of their kids changing, their kids struggling, and so, if you're new to our channel, this is the difference a mother makes show and podcast that we have that we broadcast usually at 12 pm sharp every single week on Thursday, and today we got started later. We got some guests coming on. I'd love to find out where you are and where you're from. You can text me, I'll get that. I'd love to find out where you are and where you're from. You can text me, I'll get that. I'd love to respond. But I want to get right into this because it's such an important subject for moms, especially in light of Father's Day. In the very end, I'm going to share with you a kind of a secret to the heart of your man on Father's Day? Maybe he's a birth father and not living with you, but how do you reach that baby daddy or how do you make Father's Day extra special? You might already have a great plan and would love to hear from you. You can chat me and let me know about that. But in the meantime, let's get right into this subject that we're talking about, and it's my child is changing and I don't know how to reach him.
Speaker 2:So many moms that I meet, and here's a question I want to ask right in the first slide, right in the beginning, to kind of set up our talk today. Let me ask you this when your marriage is struggling or you're a single mom or daughter, who do you see yourself to be? You see yourself to be? And that question, and it's the same with the second question when your kids are struggling, who do you see yourself to be? And I meet moms all the time. Moms are amazing. I got to tell you I had an amazing mom.
Speaker 2:I've watched Jill my five children and now a grandma to our 14, and she's extraordinary that you end up getting your personal worth and kind of who you are, from, the way your kids are behaving or the way they're receiving from you, just want to let you know that this is pre-recorded for our friends who weren't able to come to our later launch time at 2 pm Pacific Standard Time, and it's available for you. So it's for you that are watching, but it's also live for our friends to watch later. And so when you think about yourself and how you see yourself, how much of your identity is connected to the performance of your kids or how much they're receiving from you, because when you're first a mom and I'm first a dad, fathering and mother is similar in that when the kids are little, we're trying to protect them, we're trying to get them to the emergency room, especially our boys, as they're scraping, cutting, you know, breaking stuff on their bodies, you know, in sports or life, sometimes our daughters. I remember my daughter, mary. She cut her fingers, mary, she cut her fingers. A little girl. She would always put her hand many times inside the car door in the wrong place and it would get slammed and I would take her to the emergency room and just, oh, daddy, I mean it was painful for me and how I felt like, oh, I wasn't being a good dad? Well, no, she put her hands in the wrong place, and so it's really important for you to kind of answer this question, and we're going to talk about how to establish kind of to use a military term a beachhead for you as a mom, to where you know, no matter what happens with your kids as you're growing and they're changing, because as they enter those teen years, their identity, when they're just your babies are, you know, pretty much intact, as they're learning and watching you as a mom and the way you do your life, the way you love your man if you're married.
Speaker 2:But their sense of identity gets a big question mark when their audience changes and they start now going to junior high school, where the majority, way too many of those kids that they're interacting with, they're struggling in their own life because they don't have moms like you, many of them don't have moms that are very attentive or they're working all the time, and so identity is one of those things that the devil loves to attack in our children and in us, whether you're a mom or you're a dad, and the better you're able to really capture a couple of things that I want to share with you, that I had to learn. My wife Jill had to learn, as she was a mom to our kids and now our grandkids began to really change that story and began to settle her heart from. You know, many times you can just get seriously depressed because your kids are struggling, and it's not that it's not hard sometimes. But I've seen, I've coached a bunch of gals who get wiped out in their own persona and sense of who they are. Just, they just sort of lose that.
Speaker 2:And so I want to ask you another kind of a statement that I'd ask you is that and this is what we're going to talk about the most powerful thing you can do is to be secure in who God has called you to be. See, one of the most amazing things about having Christ in your life as a follower of Jesus, as a Christian, is when you really begin to discover the true identity to who God's called you to be as a mom and as a dad. And why is that so important, to be as a mom and as a dad? And why is that so important? Because the devil is constantly trying to challenge our identity or to rename us by our brokenness, rename us by our sin. He loves just kind of writing alcoholic over the heart and the life of a man or a woman, over the heart and the life of a man or a woman he loves.
Speaker 2:When you get your identity and through all of your failure and not really understanding who Christ came to call you to be and the way he reshapes that identity in you to where, no matter what happens in your life, your identity doesn't get shaken when your kids are doing bad or even when you blow it in sin, and we have a way to come back to God and receive forgiveness. But it doesn't change whether you're a son or a daughter. And the caveat to all this is that when you're raised in a family where your mom and dad aren't really good at loving one another, or they blow up and they leave, or you lose your dad in your story, or you see him like every other weekend or once a month, or you don't see him at all. Many times those gals they struggle and one of the ways they answer kind of the pain they have is they try to find a guy that's maybe safe or is not like their dad safe or is not like their dad or they kind of spend their life trying to change that guy so that they can feel safe. They try to turn their man and their husband into maybe the father they never got to have, and when you do that to your man and you put that pressure first of all, he can't ever be that guy. You might think your husband is the knight in shining armor, but underneath that armor he still stinks, yours truly included, and we need a savior just as much as anybody does. And so many guys get their identity from things that aren't related to family and yet when they discover what it's like to being a great father, it changes their life.
Speaker 2:And, a matter of fact, this Sunday, if you're in Southern California and you'd like to be with me, I'm doing a special Father's Day message at the Haven Lane Church in Yorba Linda, california. That's the Haven Lane Church in Yorba Linda, california. You can go on Instagram and look us up at Haven Lane Church and I'm really looking forward to sharing. We'd love to see you there 10 o'clock sharp, and we even will eat lunch together. Unless you're planning a lunch with your dad, you can bring your dad, bring your husband, bring your family got great childcare, and that's at 10 o'clock on Sunday. We'd love to see you there, and so how do you kind of live in this place where you really become secure in who God's called you to be?
Speaker 2:Well, look at this verse here. This is one of Jesus' prayers. It's one of my favorite go-to prayers when I'm struggling, because it's a prayer that he prayed for you and me, that God, the Father, would do something in us so profound that it would change our life forever. And look what he says, father, I desire that they also that's you and me, whom you have given me may be with me where I am to see my glory that you've given me. You see, if you were physically in the presence of Jesus over 2,000 years ago, you saw the glory of the Lord on Jesus. Now, I'm not talking about a cloud, although Peter, james and John got to witness that up on the mountain one day but you saw this reflection of something on Jesus. If you were around him. You know you'd question, you know how is he going through the hard times, how is he dealing with the 5,000 families who show up? And he, you know he blesses a couple of pieces of bread and a few sardines and it turns into a meal for 5,000 families.
Speaker 2:He lived with this resource in his life as a man that was just so extraordinary, and he didn't seem to be in a hurry. He cared about the lowest person in the group and the highest. It didn't matter where they were or what they did. He was able to be so present with everybody because he was so loved by His Father. And that's what it says here in this verse. And His prayer is that you and me could see the glory that was in Christ, that the Father had given Him because you loved Me before the foundation of the world. So the glory that was on Christ was the manifestation of the Father's love towards Him. He nurtured Himself, he got up in the morning, he went to go be with the Father so that the core of who he was would stay intact Even in His baptism.
Speaker 2:God, the Father, shows up, and what does he do? He blesses Him and says this is my beloved Son, in whom I love. And not only that, he blessed Him so that all of us who are baptized into him and receive him can hear those same words over our life, as he also wants to be the father of our story. So just imagine being that thing. Jesus' prayer was that you and me would discover his sweet spot of doing life. Sweet spot of doing life, sweet spot of being a mom, is to living in the unconditional love and care of God, the Father, through His Son Jesus and the Holy Spirit.
Speaker 2:He goes on. See, christ came to demonstrate to you and to me what it would be like for you to have the same relationship with His Father like he did. Everything comes through Christ, everything is for Christ. He's a central person in our worship, but in the midst of us worshiping him and connecting to him, he shares with us his relationship with the Father so that we can be fathered the same way through the Holy Spirit that he was Powerful stuff. See, he says here I went too fast. He said I have made I love this in the message version. Here I have made your very being known to them in the message version. Here I have made your very being known to them, father.
Speaker 2:He revealed that God was also Father. He's the Father, he's the Son, he's the Holy Spirit, who you are and what you do. He showed them. He even said there's no way to the Father but through me. And so when you saw how Jesus loved people, how he loved the poor, how he could touch the lepers and pray for them. Nobody was too unclean the woman who bled for years with a touch of His garment. As she reached out and touched Him, the healing power of the Holy Spirit flowed through him and she was restored. All the people that he interacted with and everything he did.
Speaker 2:He even summarized all of his ministry activity one day when Thomas said show us the Father and that will be enough for us. And what did Jesus say? Hey, if you've seen me, you've seen my Father. So when you're following the Father and you're listening and you're living in that place of the revelation of the glory, of the unconditional love of the Father towards Christ, now through Christ to you, that secures who God's called you to be, that identity in your life. And he goes on. He goes, and I will continue to make you known right and continue to make you know why, so that your love for me might be in them and I in them, exactly as I in them.
Speaker 2:And so the way the love of the Father comes to us is it comes through Christ. It's not like a separateness of the Father and His Son, it's all together. And when we're in Christ we get everything, every spiritual gift, every blessing, ephesians says in the heavenly places, comes to us through the person of Jesus. Even the Holy Spirit comes to us through the person of Jesus. Jesus is the central figure of all of creation. He was the voice who said let there be light.
Speaker 2:The Bible says in the New Testament that everything that was created was created by Christ and for Christ, and so he is the central one. And when we have Him, when we have Jesus in our life, not only do we have Him which is just extraordinary he shares with us His relationship with the Father, so we can have the same relationship with His Father and that's what this Scripture means with his father. And that's what this scripture means and that's why Jesus said the son of man can do nothing on his own, but only what he sees his father doing, for whatever the father does, that son does likewise. What a powerful picture. That is because now you have jesus, the son of god, who's been baptized and heard from the father that he's his beloved son, spends his days connecting with his father in the morning in his time, just loving him and watching and paying attention to what his Father was doing all around him now, through the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit isn't like their forgotten person that he kind of shows up. He's the vehicle for transferring the gifts of the Spirit, the power of God, to us, on us, for the sake of those we love and pray for. And so the more you build a relationship with Jesus, the more of the Father that you come to know and love and, at the same time, the more of the understanding of the person, of the Holy Spirit who's also as he comes to us and when you begin to flow with all three.
Speaker 2:I love what Keller says. You know the great preacher from England. He said it's kind of like the dance of the Trinity, where we're like in the center and the focus of the love of the Father, the love of the Son and the love of the Holy Spirit all directed towards one another. For the Father loves the Son and shows him. Everything he's doing, the Son loves his Father and everything he does glorifies the Father and the Holy Spirit's right in this love triangle and he's loving them both. And the power and the demonstration of what the Father, through the Son, calls Him to do. All this kind of dance of the Trinity is focused on us and making us whole so that we can love other people and care for them. That's how he takes a broken football player like me and turns me into a dad. He didn't turn me into a dad because I was fathered well. On the contrary, it wasn't like so many of your husbands that you're married to. Most men don't have dads who know how to be present and loving for the sake of their sons and their daughters, and it causes a huge wound and that wound just can fester.
Speaker 2:And when you're wounded by your dad, then you're looking for identity all the time, and so you choose things to try to fit in, to be a part of something, and so you choose things to try to fit in, to be a part of something. You know all these. You know the riots that are going on right now. You know many of the people they're finding out are actually paid actors and they're a part of this mob, right, but they're identifying. They have an identity that they're living out their story with. You imagine how empty and lonely having your core identity being your politics Because automatically now you're at war with other political people. Matter of fact, you even destroy your family if they think differently than you do, and I've watched that happen. I've had to coach families back together, getting those things out of the way.
Speaker 2:And you're probably saying, well, what do you believe? Well, I have some real core beliefs. I actually believe the government is God's third institution and the government's primary purpose is not to be the mom and dad. Family is God's number one priority. The church God designed to teach and instruct and support the family. And the government the legal, the secular which is also part of God's calling is to protect the family and the church. It's supposed to be in service to the community. It's not supposed to be the father. It's not supposed to be the mother, be the father. It's not supposed to be the mother. It's not supposed to dictate. It's supposed to be in support of God. Set it up that way in Scripture. And any time number three the government wants to be number one, you have a huge problem.
Speaker 2:So God's plan, in other words, on the totem pole of authority and power, at the very top of that pole, is families and it's moms and dads just like you. Just like you and the more you are embraced by—and here's the secret it's not standing in that role as a mom and dad or a grandma or a grandpa in superiority, standing in that role as a mom and dad or a grandma or a grandpa in superiority. No, you're in this place of constantly receiving from Jesus so that you encounter the Father's love in a greater way towards Christ and through to you, and the person of the Holy Spirit that gifts you, empowers you. As a matter of fact, even in the Bible it says that the Holy Spirit moves into our life with the Father and Son. In other words, we now become the temple of the living God. We become a worship center, right where the Father, son and Holy Spirit can set up their worship service in our heart. Isn't that a great picture in our life? And why am I talking about that so much? Because here's the deal when you live your life that way, where the core of your identity is in between the Father, son and Holy Spirit. Mom, no matter what your kids are going to, they're going to watch how you handle all their craziness. They're going to watch how you love them through it. They're going to watch how you speak the truth to them, but they're going to watch who you really are when nobody is looking.
Speaker 2:And, boy, I remember just one of those moments spending time in the Word and just trying to nurture my heart with my family and struggling with some things, and it was like the Holy Spirit dropped this right out of Scripture, right, right out of Scripture. Right this, you know, because we can do things with our bodies that actually grieve the Holy Spirit. The Scripture says, because we're the temple of the Holy Spirit. And in light of that kind of reading, that thinking that through and saying God, you know, show me, show me if there's anything in me, any wicked way in me that is growing in my heart. Because I learned something that day and this is what he said to me.
Speaker 2:He said, ed, let me preface it what's the audible voice of the Lord? When people are saying audible voice all the time, it's probably just a loud, silent, quiet unction inside of them. Then maybe many times they sort of and I think I've done this in the past where I've over kind of emphasized the voice of the Lord that makes people feel, oh, you know, I'm not like that or I don't hear the Lord that way. No, it's that internal place where he speaks in quietness and gentleness, because the Bible describes the Holy Spirit as gentle. But when his words come, when the Father begins to speak into us through a son in the Holy Spirit. It shakes you and this is one of those moments and this is what I got out of.
Speaker 2:I wrote this in my journal and this was the line he says what you do in the dark, ed, when nobody be that can take a light bulb, the light of the Lord in my perfect now, are there places that God is still working on me? Absolutely, how about you, mom? How about you? What's your go-to when the pressure's on? What's your go-to when your children are changing and they're not these little kids anymore? They're fighting you back.
Speaker 2:Because that's one of the toughest things for a mom, because so many times a mom's identity is tied right into their children and the way their children are responding to them, and they don't feel like good moms. They feel like they're bad moms. It's not true. It just means your kids are being bad and they need you know what they need sometimes. Here's the picture they need a lighthouse when the storm is raging around them. They need somebody in their life they can trust. And I want to tell you for many of the families I would say the majority of the families in our country I can't just speak worldwide, although I think the statistics would bear is there are far more mama lighthouses than father lighthouses. There's far more moms who have stood up against the storm, sometimes even an unfaithful husband who devastates them, and those kids watch mom turn to the Lord and make her stand in the light. That's amazing, that's powerful, and you can only do that when you encounter God for yourself. You can't do that if your identity is in how perfectly your husband loves you back or the way your children respond to you as teenagers.
Speaker 2:So don't think it's strange, you know James says when you encounter various trials. I think, james, we could take that verse and he could say that for being a parent. Don't think it's strange when your son comes home with a reverse mohawk Happened in my family. Why'd you do that to your head, luke? I thought it was cool and he's like, yeah, with this great hair and he's just a little guy, and so I had to shave the whole head because I just couldn't look. It's like he's a reverse Mohican. You know he's got hair here and you know he just got a hold of you know my clippers, you know, and you know they do dumb stuff.
Speaker 2:And yet one of the things I've learned is that I got to grow as a parent, I got to grow as a dad and I've watched my wife just struggle and pray and call out to God for her kids and boy. You know, I think, the combination of both of us right now. But I'm going to give a lot of credit to my wife, jill. She's just been an incredible model of never quitting believing the best, pursuing loving when she didn't feel it, and she had to get that from God for herself. You've got to get that first. You've got to get it first. Okay, a couple more things. We'll tie it together and pray.
Speaker 2:And here's kind of the application of that verse. If you jumped on a little late, you know learning how to see what their father is doing. Whatever their father does, the son does likewise, and so if you've been around me at all, you know and Jill as well, we've learned that we only have success in doing what God is doing with our children, and we're going to talk about how to discover that a little bit today and next week we'll do more. But what if you learn how to be a daughter the same way? Jesus lived out his life when he said I can only do what I see my Father in heaven doing. What if, at the end of the day, the core of your life as a daughter, the core of your identity as a woman, was to be a daughter? Receiving every day from a Father who absolutely loves you, so much so that he so loved you, he sent His only Son to die for you that you would receive Him. Not only do you receive forgiveness, you receive the power of the Holy Spirit to empower you to live the same kind of life Jesus did. It's amazing. I mean, the gospel is the only worldwide faith where the founder became the Savior, and not only the Savior. He became the communion that we take to, dying for us, and his body was broken and his blood was shed, to dying for us, and his body was broken and his blood was shed. And every time we do that, we're reminded of the incredible promise that it's not our broken body or our blood that we shed that gets us closer to God or brings in change in our life. It's his. That's what an incredible thing that is.
Speaker 2:And what would it be like if, if you, if your your core prayer. This is my application for you. I'm going to give you three little prayers to think about, praying to help unpack this, but just to spend time. When you see your husband come home or you're struggling, you're going through something and your first response is what are you doing with my husband? I'll give you a faith message. What are you doing with my ex-lord so I can partner with you? How about this? What are you doing with my teenage son? Right now he's struggling. Show me how to mother him.
Speaker 2:You're kind of living in this place where you got to receive what you need, that you don't know to be what you really want to be, and that is a mom who can really help them the best way. And so the first thing we learned is you be that kind of mom where your core identity is being a beloved daughter, loved by a father in heaven. No matter how much abuse and hurt has come your way as a woman in this crazy, sadistic world towards girls, so many times they see Christ in you, the hope of glory. You become that light on the hill right. You become the salt of the earth because Christ is in you. What would it be like to just? Your whole role is being a partner. Partner, and no matter what the outcome of that is, you can live in joy, because you know that God is working, no matter if you see it in your son or daughter or not, or in your kids or in your spouse.
Speaker 2:Next slide, so here's—actually I put in three prayers, not four, but here's the first one Father, show me the places where I am naming myself by my children right, right, or my what? Fill in the blank. Father, show me where I'm naming myself, because any identity you put on yourself other than beloved son or daughter that God called his son Jesus and in him we get adopted to become that same son or daughter to a father in heaven, every time we make a role that we have an identity like pastor, right, pastor is a role that we have an identity like pastor, right, pastor is a role that we have, and there are some great days. I got a pastor online with us now great guy, pastor Josh. But you know, if 50 people come forward and get saved on Sunday, man, what a great day. You feel like you're the greatest pastor in the world.
Speaker 2:And then Tuesday comes after your day off. If it's Monday and all of a sudden, two or three families are leaving the church, then you feel like a horrible pastor. That's the one thing about pastoring people. It's kind of like people say, well, how big's your church at? And I go. Well, it all depends on what time it is during the parade, because I get people coming in and I get people going out all the time. So if you're measuring yourself by your preconceived identity, even mom is a role right. It's a role that you are empowered to do by the Holy Spirit.
Speaker 2:And when you do that role as a daughter versus just being a mom I mean my mother would not go to sleep if we were not all in the house and sometimes we stayed out really late and she'd be tortured all night. It would have probably changed my staying out if mom went to bed and it was like you weren't worrying Nope, don't need to worry, because I prayed for you and God's going to work on you. No, but she didn't do that. She had this little doghouse thing with puppies, little wooden puppies with our names on them, and if we you know we're bad I've shared this before with you we get put in a doghouse. So the first thing we do, we come right into the kitchen, wipe by the refrigerator. There was a little wooden doghouse and we would go to see who was in that doghouse and if you were in the doghouse your week was rough with mom. If you were in the doghouse, your week was rough with mom and she only knew how to make it hard on us Because she thought the harder she was on us then we'd change.
Speaker 2:The problem is that you either become crazy like her or you just run away and hide and you act good in front of her. And so a mom struggled, my mom struggled. I love her to death. She's in heaven. I got to lead my mom to Jesus before she went to heaven. So, so grateful for that moment, so grateful for that moment. But, mom that are watching you can be a different kind of mom and when a mom is a daughter first and a role as a mom or a role as a wife or a role as being an ex to maybe a project that didn't work out in your life, a lot of girls marry guys that like to turn into the dad they never got to have kind of a project husband and when that doesn't work out, it further kind of supports their theory that there's something wrong with them and so they do themselves in over and over again. And God wants to set you free, sweetheart, from that kind of endless kind of pursuit of trying to make yourself beautiful enough, skinny enough, whatever, to be loved completely by a guy. And the only man that will really love you, hear me, is Jesus. He's the perfect boyfriend. As a matter of fact, we met this beautiful, beautiful Egyptian, gal Cried of testimony, was a Muslim and, you know, had a dream and ended up being invited to a church, to a Coptic Christian church in Egypt, and on that Sunday there was a terrorist attack in the church service.
Speaker 2:There was a bomb that went off at the altar first, which made everybody run, and then a bomb in the middle which killed a bunch of people as they were trying to escape the church. And there was a bomb at the back that went off last and she was at the very end of the row, in the very back of the church, afraid that anybody would recognize her, for fear of telling her father and mother that she was at a Christian church. And the explosion, you know, took her out and burned her like 70% of her body and she was laying and all these people were on her and she went to heaven, in her own words, and stood before Jesus. And stood before Jesus and she said do you want to go back or do you want to stay or do you want to come towards me? And she had had this dream about Jesus and her dream, and so that's why she ended up going to church. And she said to our church and she's been around the world with her story that she said, who's going to tell my family about Jesus? And she woke up on a gurney on the way out of the church into a hospital. And when they found out that she was at a Christian hospital, they didn't give her a room, they didn't give her very good care and pretty much just tortured her. And so, you know, the doctor told her she'd be burned and every that. And she called out to Jesus and I don't remember exactly where she was. But all of a sudden all of her wounds began to heal and she only had one little spot on her head.
Speaker 2:She's an absolutely beautiful Egyptian girl, an absolutely beautiful Egyptian girl, and she looked at everybody in our church and told her story. We were just our jaws were just just because she described the life before and then meeting Christ and then the persecution she had and everything and how she has to stay secret and where a burqa. Somebody recognized her, so she knows she'll be killed. And so I took her out to lunch and it's a long story to share one little point with you for those of you who are waiting for a perfect man. And I said, so we bought her lunch. She did an incredible job in our church. We were just, we were holding our breath at her story at times and then she prayed for people and it was just amazing. And so we're sitting there, we're having.
Speaker 2:I took her to a Greek restaurant. She wanted Greek food and I said to her during lunch I said, so do you have a man in your story? Because I was thinking of, like, maybe setting her up with some of my friends I knew a bunch of. I had some Egyptian friends and I thought, well, I wonder if she's married. I said, well, you're married. Do you have a man? She goes. Oh yeah, I have the most beautiful man. Do you have a man? She goes. Oh yeah, I have the most beautiful man. You know, beautiful Palestinian looking man, just olive skin, just he's grabbed my heart.
Speaker 1:And.
Speaker 2:I said, really, what's his name? She goes Yeshua. People try to set me up all the time and I tell them why would I want to have a man on earth when we have Jesus? Because I've seen him, he's just so beautiful and he's so loving and he just loves me completely and so, no, don't try to set me up.
Speaker 2:See, I think there's a place that we can all get to in our life, to where you know that the more we pursue the lord, the more we pursue jesus, the more impact our lives have, but the more we feel the love of the Father flowing through us. There's nothing quite like that for identity. The more you have that for yourself, the more powerful that is for you and to tithe together. So number one prayer show me the places where I'm naming myself by my children, or show me the places where I'm still looking to my husband or children for my identity that I need. You can be completely free. When you get your identity from God, the Father, through a son, christ, the Holy Spirit will fill you with what you need until maybe God brings you a non-Palestinian man whose name is Jesus to be a partner who makes you number two because he loves Jesus. First and finally, the third prayer. Just to think about and I pray these prayers for me as a man Father, show me how to be your beloved daughter, of course I say beloved son today, so I can partner with you for my family. So I try every day just to wake up where my core identity isn't Ed, ex-nfl football player. I use the NFL stick so I can talk to any man. They'll meet with a football player for coaching. They won't go to a counselor. So I get to sneak up on them and love them and pray for them and encourage them and know how to build men up and to lift their arm. I've been doing it for, you know, 30 some years and so grateful for that grace from God. But I can only share what God's given me, what he's done to Ed in his own heart as a man, husband, father, now grandpa to 14. So grateful. So show me how to be your beloved daughter. If you're just a couple guys here, beloved son, what would that look like? So you can partner with him. And that's a profound place to be. And here's the principle the more you live as a beloved daughter, the more you will teach your children who they are called to be and I've shared this with you before.
Speaker 2:But John Wesley's mother would, when overwhelmed with her many children she had more than 12 kids she would flip her house coat over her head and begin to pray. And John Wesley, in his journals, said that that was his first picture of what a real godly woman and mother was all about. He knew Jesus was real Not because he went to Bible school. It's because he saw the living gospel in his mama.
Speaker 2:So what is the difference you can make as a mom for your kids, no matter what age they are? They might get into the place in their life where they're, you know, sideways. The truth of the matter is that they're not going to ever forget who you are. When nobody's looking, looking, and the more you project that mom, the more impact you're going to have with your daughters, with your sons, no matter what age they are, and to their own families to be a part of their life. Because when you're saying, lord, what are you doing with my son or daughter? Then when you even become like a mother-in-law towards maybe a daughter for your son or a son for your daughter and we're going to deal with that and talk about that some next week is you won't try to push him around or her around when you see something that's broken. You're waiting on what God is doing in them so you can partner, and when you do that, you won't lose their heart and drive them away. So we'll talk about that next week. That's a powerful way where you can be a mother-in-law and end up becoming a mother-in-love where your new daughter or your new son wants you over all the time because they love the life that you're giving to them Powerful stuff.
Speaker 2:And so, finally, I promised you about Father's Day, and so you know dads get all kinds of fun gifts from their kids all the time. But I'll tell you what. There's one gift that I've received numerous times from my children, and it is the whole. It's my favorite thing in father's day and that's when my children take time around our dinner for together, or they write me a note or, um, they call me on the phone and their conversation because of all the changes that God's done in my life and the way I blessed them and spoke life into them. They, in turn, speak life into their dad, and every dad in America on father's day has the same question did I measure up? Was I a good father.
Speaker 2:Maybe they were broken dad, but something really powerful happens when you as a wife, or you as your children, you maybe say you know, dad. Would you know? Think about you connecting with your dad and telling him maybe some things you saw in him that you really love about him. And maybe your dad wasn't a very good dad, and yet there's always something that you can start a conversation. It could change his whole life, it could absolutely rock the way he sees himself by you just kind of doing that. And one of the things that you could do is I wrote a book called the Difference a Father Makes and if you've ever, you know, been around, you go to my website.
Speaker 2:If you go to thefatherdifferencecom, you'll see it there. We have a way for you to give a free copy, even today, digitally, to your dad for Father's Day. And I wouldn't say hey dad, read this, because you are a jerk and this would really help you. But grab it yourself, give it a spin, it's absolutely free, and maybe find something in the book that reminds you of your dad and you go hey Dad, I read a book and I want to send it to you, but there's a part that really spoke to me about you and just bless him with it, say you know, this guy named this football player wrote this book and really spoke to me, but you remind me of this story or you remind me of this thing and that would be powerful. And we don't make any money on that. A donation of our donors allows us to give away books, and so do that. Go to my website and you can do that and it's a free book. And here's the link it's just thefatherdifferencecom slash free book and you just send in your email address and it will send you back a copy, a digital copy, of that book that you can share with your dad or share the link with him if he wants it himself and if you want to grow also in your own ability to hear the father and see what he's doing himself.
Speaker 2:I wrote a special book that I think will really help you and it's called the Father You've Always Wanted and it's really about how God the Father comes in and heals those places in us that never got developed in our childhood and becomes the father of our story, where we can hear him, see him, follow him. We produced it years ago by Baker, bought the rights. We have this in our bookstore. There might be some online that probably want too much money for them. There's a digital, there's even an audio version, I believe, online. But go, and if you go to our website you can grab one. We'll ship it right out to you. It's a great book for a devotional and it's got a little place in every chapter. I'd love for you to have that copy and all that to say.
Speaker 2:If you're a dad watching, you got kids happy Father's Day. If you're a mama out there, I got so many that are here. It's too many to name. I'll just name a few. We got Miss Kay Well, bless you, mrs Kay and so many girls Jen's here and some of my great friends that come every week and this will be replayed. You can send this link to somebody else on Facebook or Instagram or YouTube. We got to pop it up.
Speaker 2:Actually, we're not on Facebook with this because of the brokenness of our post, but before I get off of this, before I get offline, I want to pray for you, just as a dad, as a grandpa, as a father that God has blessed me to be a father and a grandfather like I never thought I could ever be, but I always wanted to be and I'm learning all the time. I'm far from being perfect. I'm flawed, I'm still a guy and I still embarrass my wife at times, you know, and so I'm not perfect, and she's amazing in that she likes me and loves me and gives me room to be a man, and that's an incredibly powerful gift from my wife for me. So I want to pray for you, father. I pray for your daughters that are watching and those who will watch, and your sons who are watching that you right now. I pray that you, if they've spent years just not sure about who they are because of their childhood or their life or places they went sideways.
Speaker 2:Father, I pray right now that you would come and just reveal your love through Jesus right now, because he is the way, the truth and the life. He's the way to the Father, he's the truth about the Father and he's the love of the Father, the manifestation of love of the Father to us. Maybe you've never totally received him. If you've walked away. Maybe this is your day.
Speaker 2:You can pray, just a simple prayer, same one I prayed many years ago Father, forgive me for all those places where I run away from you. Forgive me for the sin that wants to grab my life and name me, and I ask you to forgive me. I need you in my life, jesus. I want to receive you totally in my life as my Savior. Come and fill my life and do what John 15 says, where you want to come in and make your home in us. Father, I need you in my life and maybe this is your prayer as well. Father, I want your blessing as a daughter, as a son.
Speaker 2:My dad never knew how to bless me, and so I just say, in the name of Jesus, the same blessing that God spoke in that river, and so I just say, in the name of Jesus, the same blessing that God spoke in that river that echoed over those waters, that John the Baptist witnessed as he put Jesus in that Jordan River and pulled him out. The Holy Spirit descended upon Jesus in that moment and everything that Jesus need and prayed for happened in a moment over him and his prayer before Father. I can't do this without the Holy Spirit in my life. And it just came down like a dove and landed on him. And then Luke says he prayed another prayer. We don't know the prayer, but we see the effect of what happened in that river and the audible voice of the Father spoke over his son and said this is my beloved son, whom I love. And the Father says to you you are my beloved daughters and sons and whom I love.
Speaker 2:And 2 Corinthians 6, verse 18, says and I will be a father to you and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord, god Almighty. And God, the Father, says this Father's Day, I will bless you, even if your dad didn't. I will bless your life with every spiritual blessing I have in the heavenly places and I will bless your life with every spiritual blessing I have in the heavenly places. And I will use your life and it doesn't matter how you started, and I will bless you as a mom with an identity that's bigger than the performance of the kids or the depths of your husband's love. I'm going to bless you and keep you and back you up, because you are my beloved daughter and whom I love. And, father, I ask you to bless them and I ask you to bless your sons that are watching as well, and that you would heal the family and really make fathers and mothers great again in our country. Lord, for the sake of families, that you'd heal the family. Heal the family, father, heal their families. Use us to bring a holy revolution in families for the sake of our kids and our grandkids. And, if you agree with that prayer, just say Amen In the name of Jesus. We pray so grateful for you. Thanks for coming.
Speaker 2:Sorry about the snafu on the recording of this. You can go back and watch this. It's recording on YouTube, instagram Rumble, rumble's awesome and on X. If you're on X, mark the spot where the real treasure is. I'm not talking about Elon Musk, but I'm talking about Jesus. So grateful to be with you. Thanks for joining us today. Got a closing little video that'll play right as we close. Enjoy, I'm praying for you. Happy Father's Day. You want to come and visit us? We're going to be at Haven Lane Church in Yorba, linda. It'll also be live on Instagram and YouTube. You can go there on Sunday if you'd like to see me preach and kind of do my thing and thank you and keep praying for Jill and I Keep supporting us. We are so grateful for you. We couldn't do it without you. Lord bless you.
Speaker 1:Dear friends, imagine a world where every father feels equipped to lead with faith, love and purpose, A world where families thrive and communities grow stronger because of devoted, Christ-centered fathers.
Speaker 2:You know, beloved. That is the vision that God's put in my heart for every single family. You know he is on the move. I believe he promises in Malachi that before the great and coming day of the Lord, he's going to do something profound. He's going to turn the hearts of fathers back towards their children, so the hearts of their children will turn back to their father. That's what God is doing.
Speaker 2:I meet dads daily who want to learn to be better fathers. Yet many have never been shown how Too many families are being fractured through bitterness and with parents and grandparents even being canceled. That's why we're launching an online community to equip men to be the fathers that God has called them to be. It's more than a program. It's a part of a movement that God is already doing to reshape fatherhood as a sacred calling rooted in the teachings of Christ, and we're calling this the Fatherhood Academy, where men will embark on a journey of healing and spiritual restoration that helps them transform their family relationship. And to make this vision a reality, would you consider partnering with us financially as we continue to reach and disciple every man, dad and grandpa that comes our way? Your donation will help create a ripple across the neighborhoods, communities, you know, and ultimately our nation. Anchoring each child, here's a vision in the unwavering love and guidance of a devoted dad.
Speaker 1:Will you partner with us in guidance of a devoted dad. Will you partner with us? Your gift, whether a one-time donation or ongoing monthly support, will help to transform lives. Together, we can equip fathers and grandfathers to lead with faith and create a brighter, hope-filled future for generations to come. Click the link to donate today. Thank you for believing in this mission and joining us on this transformative journey.
