The Father Difference

The Extraordinary Power of Fatherhood

• Ed Tandy McGlasson

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Ed Tandy McGlason explores the extraordinary power of fatherhood and how dads can rise up to be the fathers God has called them to be in these challenging times. He draws from personal experience and powerful stories to illustrate how a father's presence fundamentally shapes a child's identity and future.

• When fathers are present and loving, children develop a secure identity
• The deepest search in life is to find a father figure who represents strength and wisdom
• Ed shares a powerful story about ministering to prisoners without father figures
• Over 95% of incarcerated men didn't have fathers present in their lives
• Enoch's transformation in Genesis 5:21 shows how fatherhood drives men toward God
• God promises to be a father to us and bless us with everything we need
• The family is God's first institution, with the church second and government third
• Being a loving dad is more meaningful than any professional achievement

Visit www.thefatherdifference.com/links for a free book download and information about personal coaching.


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Speaker 1:

Well, if you're just tuning in, I am your host, ed Tandy McGlason, and I'm so grateful. I'm coming to you here not from our studio but from a little beach house here that my wife's family is a part of in Newport Beach, and so I want to take some time on this Father's Day weekend, coming up to encourage you, if you're a dad, and to maybe give you a few little things and tools to think about how powerful and how extraordinary you are as a father and, with all these things going on in the world, there's probably never been a time that's more important for you to rise up and be the father that God has called you to be, especially in these days. How many would agree? I'd love to hear from you If you want to drop me a question or a comment. We're going to have a shorter show today, but we're actually gearing up this weekend for a really special local event here in Southern California. It's the extraordinary, it's the superpower of dad and grandpa. It's going to be a breakfast that's covered. All you got to do is show up. If you're in the Southern California area, we're going to record it. So don't worry, we're going to get it to you On June, the 15th at 8 am to 12,.

Speaker 1:

You'll be done by 12. You can go back to work, go back to your home to receive the Father's Day festivities of the weekend, but we want to celebrate you if you're a dad and so come on out, have breakfast with me, be some coaching time and some time if you've got a grandson, an older grandson or a son to come. All you got to do is shoot your camera on that little barcode there on the screen and you can register right now. Make sure you get your seat. We have covered this a minute. So, dads, how you doing? How's it going with your family? How's it going with your kids? How are you doing and what do you think? I meet dads all the time and have literally had the opportunity of coaching them all over the world. Remember a young man that soon to be father, from Ukraine, got on the phone with me not too long ago and he spent most of his life trying to navigate being a man, now being a father. And you know he just got a hold of me. He was on the streets of Paris, from Ukraine to Paris, on a cell phone for a coaching call, and so grateful for that, so grateful that I had an opportunity of meeting him and praying for him and in the background, believe it or not, was the Eiffel Tower.

Speaker 1:

So this message of the Father Difference that we do is literally going all over the world. Our book is being downloaded all over the world. Matter of fact, before we get started and you have not gotten a copy of my book, the Difference a Father Makes you can get it right at our site on thefatherdifferencecom. It's a free gift to you. You get free access. Or maybe you know a dad or somebody who needs to be encouraged this Father's Day. I guarantee you, if you've not read it and you get through the introduction without crying, you will be the first man out of somewhere close to 500,000 guys who have are helping us get this book everywhere we can possibly get it online.

Speaker 1:

Okay, let's get to the task at hand here, and I've named this the extraordinary power of being a father. Most of the dads out there don't think they have much power as a dad. That's not even close. There's something extraordinary because inside of all of us I love this quote by Wolf here that I'm going to show you on the screen that the deepest search in life. It seemed to me, the thing that, in one way or another, was central to all living was man's search and women's search, by the way to find a father, not merely the father of his flesh, not merely the lost father of his youth, but this incredible pursuit, this image of strength and wisdom, thomas Wolfe writes, external to his need, superior to his hunger, to which the belief and power of his own life could be united.

Speaker 1:

Something happens to us when we are fathered, whether we're a daughter, whether we're a son. But when we're fathered it's an extraordinary thing indeed, because there's a part of you which is really your superpower, dad of identity, that you have in you as a dad to help your children really connect to who God has made them to be. And when you're present and when you're loving, and when you help them kind of connect to who God's made them to be, they don't. They don't enter their teen years and even you know, from adolescence, in their teen years, into college, with a question mark who am I? Because they got something that happens when you're present and that is my dad loves me. And when your kids know that at the core of who they are, it gives them a courage to live out their dream, unlike many of the friends out there. You know we have these iPhone devices, which I really think was. It was created out of the incredible need that young people have on social media of having friends, of connecting, of finding out who they are, of building relationship. And when you are a young person and you have a question mark about who you are, because maybe your relationship with your dad, he was, say you're a loving dad, I don't. I've not met a dad yet, even the broken ones in prison that we visited, administered to throughout the years that didn't at some level love their children, but many of them just never knew what to do because they never had a dad in their story.

Speaker 1:

Let me tell you a little story. I was in the maximum security place in a real notorious prison in the Midwest and it happened to be Martin Luther King Day. It happened to me Martin Luther King Day, and so we convinced a warden and chaplain to let us do a service in the general population and I was told you know, that's a pretty rough group there that you're trying to minister to and talk to Chaplains. They just kind of eat them up. And so I said well, you know, I'd like to talk to them. So they all file into this, you know kind of guarded by guards gymnasium. There's a bleacher system, there's a stage removed about 20, 30 feet from them and armed guards everywhere and sort of it was interesting to me. They were stating, according to their tribe, maybe their perceived identity, that they had taken up in prison. There was a group with not much hair, the skinheads, one kind of the left-hand side of the gym. There was a group of Hispanic men and women Men, they're not women, of course, they were in the middle and they filed in. And then there's African-American group and in there there were a number of different nationalities and they filed in. And then there's African American group and in there there were a number of different nationalities, and so they were there.

Speaker 1:

And just before the message started, this gentleman walks in and he's just sort of sauntering and he has four guys around him. And he's just sort of sauntering and he has four guys around him and I noticed him and I figured that's the guy, that's the notorious guy here in this prison. He's what some might call the man, the boss. So he goes in and sits on the front row, has this group around him and I walk off the stage and the guard goes where are you going? He says I want to go talk to this guy. So I walk over and they kind of follow me and I say that's okay. And I sit next to him and he looks at me with kind of a dirty look. He says what are you doing here? And I said well, hi, my name's Ed McGlasson and I'm here to share something with you that will help you get your kids back.

Speaker 1:

He looks at me and he just I got a lot of kids. I never really liked white people very much. And I said well, I can understand, but if you'll listen to me and what I have to say, there might be something for you that might unlock this incredible thing inside of you that's not in prison here, and that is your ability of learning how to be a father. You might have been put in jail because of a crime, because of a crime, but the way you relate to your children can determine whether or not they end up in this prison one day. And he looks at me and gives me the nod and go back to the stage. I tell you my heart goes. I might have played against Mean Joe Green and against all these guys and Randy White and back in the day, and all these great football players.

Speaker 1:

But you know that was a step of faith right into you know a place and I was, you know, getting the cheers and the jeers from the skinheads over here, and my Mexican brothers were kind of hooting and hollering as I'm walking back, and my Mexican brothers were kind of hooting and hollering as I'm walking back, and so I did my best to share about the power of the one thing that the jail can't take away from you, and that is what happens when you get out of here. If you really learn how to be a great father, what would happen to your children? Do you want to build a prison for them, maybe, like it was built for you because you didn't have dads. And I mean, it was an extraordinary moment and I said look, if you'd like to receive Christ in your life and be forgiven for your sin. And when I learned how to be a great dad, I want you to get out of your seat. And it was a stampede.

Speaker 1:

I can't tell you how many came, but the one guy I was fishing for was this notorious character and he, he walks out, his entourage follows him and he pushes all the way to the front of the stage and I remember looking at him and I said you know, man, many of you that are here, um, we're put in this prison way before you did any crime. How many of you had a loving dad in your story? Raise your hand. Not a single hand went up. And I said how many of you were raised by a hard man or the streets or gang or bosses? All their hands went up. What would it mean to you if you, something could happen to you inside that would turn you from a convict into a loving dad? What would that be worth to you? And one young man. All that I got.

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Because I know one thing about you guys no matter what you've done, no matter how bad you might have been, I don't think any of you want your children to have to live the life you lived, and it's like you got that right. So I prayed for them and asked them if they'd like to receive Jesus. Pray this with me. And I led them in prayer and then I prayed for them that the love and blessing of God, the Father, would descend on them to make them the father they never got to have.

Speaker 1:

And I want to tell you, the first guy that started sobbing was that notorious leader of that gang. He was sobbing. He never felt the love and presence of Jesus and the love of the Father in his life. He learned at an early age to be a gangster. It was the only identity he knew gangster. It was the only identity he knew and he had. Just it was just amazing. All these men, the guards at the end of this, said you know, we've seen a lot of these events, we've never seen anything like that. And I said to him you know, when you heal the reason that these guys are in prison, and it's not just because you're criminals, but every single one of these men that's in here has been a boy at one time in his life who looked for a dad, and the majority of them I guess the numbers are pretty astounding, over 95% of them didn't have a father. That was present in their story.

Speaker 1:

You want to know how powerful you are as a dad. You can either build a prison for your kids or you can build a life where nothing's impossible. See, that's what the Bible says. There's a very famous guy in the Old Testament. His name was Enoch and I found this verse and it's the way God makes us to be powerful fathers in Genesis 5, 21. Now read this, think about this when Enoch had lived 65 years and he fathered Methuselah and he fathered Methuselah. And then it says Enoch walked with God after he fathered Methuselah 300 years and had other sons and daughters.

Speaker 1:

Something profound happens in us as men when we become fathers. We can either run away or we can go to God and say God, without you, I can't do this. And, by the way, that's the secret, that's the absolute secret of being a great dad and that's the secret of having a superpower. It's a secret of being able to father your kids through all the things that they need, because when you're present and you're pursuing and you're loving them, it changes everything. It changes everything Because when your kids know that you are present, it gives them courage to go for it. You might not think you matter much, you might have been divorced from mama and you think well, you know, I'll never be able to have the same thing. It's not true. A single dad's hurt. Some of the most extraordinary fathers there are because they got. They got a doubly hard time of connecting many times through lots of miles in between them and their kids, and sometimes through lingering pain of divorce and separation.

Speaker 1:

But when you press in and learn how to receive from God for yourself, here's a verse that's a promise for you and this is how we become great fathers. It's something that happened to me. You all know I lost my dad before I was born and then I had a stepfather that did everything he could to be in my story. But when this happened to me in 2 Corinthians 6.18, the same way it happens in you. God's promise is and I will be a father to you and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord, god Almighty. God is more committed in you learning to be a good father than you are committed in being one, and you learning to be a good father, then. You are committed in being one Because he knows that when you're in place, it breaks the power of what the enemy tries to do. See, when God created this world and everything, the very first institution he made, the very first core part of his family, was. He made family first. He made fathers and mothers. Adam and Eve came together and had children. He blessed them and marriage was the first incredible covenant that God gave between a man and a woman, but he also then made us to be fathers and multiply and be fruitful, and he did that before there was a church.

Speaker 1:

The second thing that God has as priority is the church, and being in part of a great church is vital in your own life as a man. If you're not in a local church, we can help you find one. You need that in your life. You need other guys bouncing off of you. You need other men in your story. It's powerful for you.

Speaker 1:

But the third thing that's supposed to support the first two is the state or the government. Their job isn't to rule over the family or the fathers or the mothers. Their job is to protect and support, and all of that is appointed by God. It's interesting today that the government thinks it's the mother and the father. They want to determine everything, even gender, with our children. They want to be the ones to protect classes and do all those kind of things without ever referring to the most powerful people in the land that are God's people, and that's moms and dads. There's no one that has more authority or power with your children than you do, whether you feel it or not. And then the church, when families are healthy. Churches strive to be there to support, to educate, to train. It's God's model, and then the state down here. It's God's model, and then the state down here. So the most powerful man alive is the father who knows who God has called him to be, and the husband who knows who God's called him to be and lays his life down for his wife.

Speaker 1:

No-transcript, gosh, when you do that, I know for me. I had a lot of wins in the NFL and had a lot of losses, a lot of ups and downs, but nothing like Enoch. Nothing felt like what Enoch experienced when he became a father at 65 years old, because when you become a father, it causes you to lean into God. I say God, this is too big for me. Would you show me how to do it? And boy, that is what God waits for for you and for me. So you need that superpower. That's what God does.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to share another scripture with you. We're going to tie this all together. Not only did he say I'll be a father to you, but he then promises how he does that. He's going to look at it, says that he's going to bless us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places. God, the Father, wants to bless you in your life. You might say, well, I've blown it out, I've messed up. Well, I guess what you can't mess up too much, that you can't go to God and ask him to forgive you and show you how to be a father.

Speaker 1:

And just like that story earlier I shared about that prison and that notorious character wanting to be a father, I wish I could tell you. It sent me an email. He got out and became a great dad. But something happened in the heart of those men in that prison and I would bet you many of them didn't go back to prison. They became great fathers.

Speaker 1:

You can make all the money in the world, you can be the baddest hombre in all the world, but if you don't have the heart of your children, you ache as a man, don't you? So not only does God want to change your heart and really call you out to be that father and to really know what that means. He promises to bless you with every spiritual blessing, that father, and to really know what that means. He promises to bless you with every spiritual blessing. He's going to do that in your life, beloved. And when that happens. You get to see the fruit of what God can do through your life, and I got to tell you honestly I have an extraordinary life, not because I played in the National Football League I have arthritis to remember at times but where my life is extraordinary is in two places in that God has shown me every day how to love my wife. She is extraordinary, beautiful first girl to ever like me and the lover of my life, and he's showing me every day how to be a father to help my children navigate the crazy world we have. And so your best gift this Father's Day, before everybody gives that to you, is right here in this moment. God wants to unlock that superpower in you of being a great father, great present, loving dad.

Speaker 1:

No matter what you're going through, it doesn't matter how much money you have. It doesn't matter how much fame you have. It really doesn't matter. Matter of fact, it actually hurt my children in the early years, trying to live up to the legend that people build around me because I played professional football. I got to play football because I was hungry and someone athletic, combined those two and I was a big guy and it was strong, gave me some great opportunities and I was tenacious, I worked, I worked really hard to make it. It's really it's a unique elite crowd that I got to be in, but it doesn't come close to being a loving, present dad, and you see it in your kids and you see it in your grandchildren.

Speaker 1:

Because when it's all done, when you're pushing up daisies or getting ready for that last moment in your life, what kind of conversation do you want to have around your bed or that place where you end up going to heaven? I want my kids there, I want my grandkids there and, if I keep treating my body better, my great-grandkids. I want to know if I made a difference At the core of my life. I want to know that I made a difference. How about you, friends? How about you and I'm sharing this with you today, just before Father's Day, to say to you that you, my friend in Christ, with every spiritual blessing that God has for you, are the guy that can turn your whole family around. And when you've got your wife with you and most of them are already in the game it's extraordinary. Even if you have an ex-wife, your children need their dad. You will never not be their father, even if they're doing this to you.

Speaker 1:

One of the things of our ministry is that we have coaching and a coaching program that we have available. If you go to thefatherdifferencecom and you say, ed, I really need some help, I need some coaching to help me get to the next level as a man, as a father, as a husband, that's what we do. You can go to my website there it's on the screen thefatherdifferentcom, and we'd love to serve you. I mean, my mission in life is really to help you connect to the love and blessing of the Father so that you can be the man, husband and father that God's called you to be. And boy. When I see that in your eyes, as you begin to have traction and you begin to father your children and even love your wife, as much enthusiasm as you have of going to work and making some bucks, that's a powerful day. And so I wanted to share one other thing with you. Maybe you want to connect with our ministry. This next slide will kind of connect you to kind of what we're doing.

Speaker 1:

But I have a program, online program, that we offer right now for a limited time. It's a free video program. It's kind of your next step. We call it the Men of Honor Training. It's a master course in a live coaching group and you can go right to our website or the link that comes on the screen and get it right now for free. And I want to say this to you If this blesses you and you're getting value from this and I know well because if it can change this old football player, it can change anybody then I want to encourage you to help support us, to give donations monthly or yearly to help us give this away to other men around the world who are struggling, who've never had a dad in their story or had one, and that dad was notorious. So get your free access. We'd love to give this to you. It's a gift on Father's Day.

Speaker 1:

And lastly but not least, the link to my book we're going to put on the screen that Derwin DeFather makes. Would you help me get this everywhere we can? You can grab that link. You type that in thedifferentoffathermakescom slash free book. You can send it to all your friends and say hey, I listened to this football player. If God can do it with him, he can do it with you. He can help you.

Speaker 1:

How many friends do you have that are struggling right now, who don't know how to be the good father they want to be, but maybe never got tools from your dad because your dad's worked all the time or weren't there and some were really abusive to him. But you can get that. If you're a gal who slipped in here today and is watching this, I'm so grateful that you're here as well. Sow this into your man's life and it seems like ex-football players are less intimidating to your husband than therapists and I'm not a therapist, I'm a life coach and I coach out of the fact that if God can do this with me, he can do this with anyone. And, last but not least, if you're in the Southern Cal.

Speaker 1:

Oh, we got one other thing. I have a daily kind of devotional for men and women that we send out that you can also get right through our website or you can click on that link with your phone if you're on your computer and sign up right now. It's our gift to you and it's kind of a nugget of learning how to hear God, the Father and His Son every day through the Word of God, and so it's our gift to you. We send it to people literally all over the world and we want to sow that into your life. And so, last but not least, I'd love the honor of just praying with you right now, if you want to throw a prayer request in there. And I mentioned in the beginning of the show my faithful sister reminded me by flashing that up on the screen we have a breakfast this Saturday in Costa Mesa, california the superpower of dads and grandpas. You not only get a free breakfast it's been already paid for by somebody but we got a free gift for you. I can't wait to sow that into your life.

Speaker 1:

The Harbor Light Church, 1734 Orange Avenue, costa Mesa. We're going to rebroadcast this later on our podcast so you won't miss anything. But if you're in the area, come, bring an older grandson or son that you would like to have at that event. And because we're going to have some clinic time and do some work with kids. And maybe you're single and you're thinking well, why would I want to go to an event like this? Well, you want to get married one day. I tell you what girls find men who know how to love kids and be fathers before they sire any as being, and be fathers before they sire any, as being irresistible. It could be your secret sauce to getting an incredible woman of your dreams as well. We have all that to say.

Speaker 1:

I'd love to pray with you before Father's Day, father. I thank you for my friends that are watching. I thank you for their support. I thank you for just the amazing difference that so many of them make and I pray right now for them. I pray for their families, I pray for their relationship with their children. I ask you, lord, that do miracles and bring healing and restore them with their children in ways that they never thought would ever be possible. I pray, lord, that just from this moment, even this week in their life, they become like Enoch and they walk with you for the rest of their days.

Speaker 1:

Maybe you've been far away from Jesus in your own life, or maybe you've never received him and you've just happened across his link on X or Instagram or Facebook or LinkedIn and you know you've never fully given your life to Jesus. I want to invite you right now. It's just a simple prayer. He wants to prove he's real to you. Just pray this with me, jesus. I need a new beginning with my family, with my life, and I ask you, jesus, to come into my life and save me, to heal me. Forgive me for trying to do my life without you. Forgive me of my sin and come into my life as my Savior, in the name of Jesus, amen, amen. If you just prayed that, would you just let us know? Send me an email. You can connect to me at thefatherdifferencecom. It would be a joy to hear from you. Stay tuned.

Speaker 1:

Next week, we're going to get deeper into learning how to bring back kids or maybe it's a young man that's dating your daughter or how to help them really connect to who God's called them to be, maybe restore your relationship with your kids. So we're going to talk about that next week. Make sure you tune in. I've got a bunch of shows on my channel. Make sure you hit the subscribe button and follow me on Facebook, instagram, youtube. Make sure you follow so you get an alert for things that we're sending out. We want to stay connected to you and resource you. It is never too late for you to become the man husband and father maybe single dad that God's meant you to be. It's never too late for God to do a miracle in your life, and I want to be one of the first ones to say it. Happy Father's Day, because without fathers, we don't have a world. God bless you, my friend. Thanks for tuning in.

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Ed Tandy McGlasson

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