A Father's Heart Under Pressure

Feeling the squeeze of fatherhood, marriage, and modern life? We dig into a deeper aim than comfort: becoming men whose character can carry the weight of love. Drawing on scripture, research, and lived experience, we challenge the cultural drift that has reduced happiness to self-gratification and offer a stronger, older vision—one in which purpose, virtue, and service create lasting joy.

Along the way, Pastor Ed shares two powerful stories. First, a knock at the front door turns into a tear-soaked salvation, a reminder that faithfulness makes us available for holy moments. Second, a treacherous mountain drive in a whiteout becomes a living parable: sometimes all you get is a faint line to follow. That’s how scripture works—as a lamp to your feet, enough for the next step. We talk practicals for dads and husbands: measuring progress by perseverance, treating marriage and parenting like a craft to better at, and choosing steady pursuit over instant results.

If you’re tired, discouraged, or tempted to bail, this conversation reorients your aim from pleasure to purpose and offers a simple practice to keep moving: follow the line. Subscribe, share this with a dad who needs a lift, and leave a review with the one takeaway you’ll act on this week. Your next faithful step starts now.

p.s. Visit www.thefatherdifference.com/links for a free book download and information about personal coaching.

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Transcript

Mission And Invitation

SPEAKER_00 1:01

What kind of father do you want to be? What kind of man do you want to become for your family and for yourself? If you've ever wondered how to step into the fullness of your role as a father, husband, and man of God, then you're in the right place. Here at the Father Difference, our mission is to inspire and equip men to be the best fathers they can be. It's a powerful mission. And today, we're going to explore exactly how you can take steps toward that calling. Whether you're a father, a son, a husband, grandfather, single dad, stepfather, or just looking to grow, I believe God has something powerful for you in today's message. Whether you're tuning in live or watching this later, we are so excited to have you here. If this is what you're looking for, then subscribe so you can tune in each week to the Father Difference Live. You can sign up below. And now your host, a husband, father, grandfather, author, and former NFL player, Pastor Ed McGlass.

The Happiness Trap And Its Roots

Purpose, Character, And True Fulfillment

Scripture’s Call To A New Life

Rewards, Faithfulness, And unseen Work

Marriage, Parenting, And Hard Work

SPEAKER_02 2:16

Hey my friends, it's good to be with you. Today we are going to look at a father's heart under pressure. You know, part of being a dad, part of uh being here for kids, part of being a spiritual father. Maybe you're involved in a church, you're you're on a leadership team, or you're just a regular guy that's doing the best he can to be a dad. There's times when we come under incredible pressure, and we get pushback. We get pushback from our kids, we get pushback from our wives sometimes, our spouses. We get pushback from our friends. And yet being a father isn't for the timid, especially in the day that we live in. And I want to share with you today uh something that I I think you're gonna understand something at the end that's really gonna it's really gonna help you hang in the battle that you're in of being a dad. You ready? So let's talk let's let's kind of get into this and and talk about what it means to be a great dad. And to kind of preface this, I I heard an incredible sermon on Sunday from JP Moreland. And if you don't know who JP Moreland is, incredible writer, theologian, teacher, and he he dropped a holy uh bombshell in our church, and we were just so excited about him being there, and and really it's it confronts this idea that you know I think much of the church is kind of adopted or thinks that the purpose of so if I were to say to you, what is the the purpose that God has for your life? What do you think that is to fulfill a dream, a vision, to be a great dad, to be, you know, if you're a mom watching tonight, and so many things you know around identity, but there's this overarching place where he pointed out and just incredible uh sermon on Sunday, where he's talking about that the goal for most people in Christendom is just to be happy. You want to be happy as a dad, you you want to get the pressure off, you want to, you know, you want your kids to be happy. And and it all depends on what the definition of of happiness is. Because, you know, that definition definition has changed. Uh uh Dennis Prager uh did a great article about happiness, and and he said that uh there's uh that they've done research in in the last you know 20, 30 years, it's it's for the for the baby boomers or that generation, the rate of unhappiness has increased tenfold in one generation. You know, our our young people today are in a place where they don't feel like they can live the American dream. And yet I meet dads all the time who want to be happy, they they want to feel like they're really making a difference. They they want to know that their lives count for something. And yet their own personal stress, hence uh what we were looking at in the thumbnail for this today, is they feel under pressure all the time, and they feel like maybe something's wrong. And one of the things that Dennis Prager discovered in his research was people, because of the current definition of happiness, uh, people started stopped giving themselves away to something bigger than themselves, and they started to live entirely for themselves, for whatever their needs are, whatever their wants are. That's being fed to our children, that's being fed to our wives if we're married, that's being fed all through the culture, that's being fed to us. That this whole life is about our needs being met so that we can feel good about who we are and we can be happy. And so part of the that's the that's the root of the problem in the church today, and why a lot of young people are turning away from God in different places is because they think that the root of the problem is the church isn't meeting my needs. I want to be happy. And and what uh what happened back in the turn of the century, they they changed the definition uh of happiness, where the ancient word for happiness, in the way, even in a Webster dictionary, was about this about this word of wisdom or the the peace of God. Uh it came around a life that's built with character. It's a life that you you grow in, that that you suffer through. It's a life where you don't quit. It's a life where you build great character. And so that there's this destination of who God has made you to be. And in the midst of you living for something bigger than yourself, for you living in a place where you're giving your lives away, there's incredible satisfaction that comes to you because you're you learn to partner with God for something way bigger than you. And when when that happens to you as a man, it changes your whole understanding. Because if you just live for the pleasure of the moment or the pleasure of the flesh, and you're just you're constantly looking for a life that just makes you happy all the time, it doesn't exist, it's an illusion. And the life that that really is worth living, and when you ultimately, what the scripture says, when we learn to do what the father's doing, when we learn to give our lives to our children, when we learn to understand that the life that's under pressure is the most powerful life you can live. It's the life that's I mean, diamonds are produced by what? Great pressure. And so if you want to live a diamonds life, you're gonna have to go through the battle. And so many of our young people today, they they're just retreating from things that are hard to do because they want it instantaneously. And, you know, that that when JP Morton was doing his research and and seeing where Webster actually changed the definition of happiness at the turn of the century, and how that's turned into the goal of so many people in the West. We have so much pleasure here. We have so many things where we don't want pain, we want everything to be instantaneous, and we want the gospel to work for us. We want a gospel that doesn't make us feel bad about what we do, right? Sound familiar? We want a gospel that we can what create in our own image. The only problem is when you get that gospel, it has no power, it has no power to transform us, it then makes us life. As a matter of fact, in 2 Corinthians 5, 17, Paul writes, right, for those in Christ become what? A brand new creation. Behold, the oldest come, and the new, everything becomes new. The oldest is taken away, and everything becomes new because you give your life for something that's worthy of the Lamb who died for you, Christ who died for you. It's an I mean, think about your life and think about those breakthroughs and those places that you are the most proud of in your life with God. Think about those things that you've done where you applied yourself and you worked hard and you think about the satisfaction of that promotion you got because you really pushed through it. You built that character, right? You you're trustworthy, you you bless the employees you work with, you outworked everybody there. I mean, one of the one of the things that was a scripture that I learned when I was a young football player when I encountered Christ in my life. And it was do with in whatever you do, do your work heartily as for the Lord and not for men. And this guy drew a stadium and said, you know, don't play for the crowd. Put Jesus in the stadium there, and and no matter what it takes, don't quit and build a life that he's proud of in you. The life of Christ that he gives us so freely. But it's it's hard work. I mean, raising kids today and navigating your daughters and your sons and your relationship with your wife, there it takes hard work. I mean, great marriages are they're not automatic, they're not like hallmark moments where you get the kiss and you're instantly in love for the rest of your life and and you don't have challenges. It's it's hard work. It's there, there's a there's trenches that you got to live in. And so I'm gonna look at Jesus' antidote for the world's broken definition of happiness, and that gives us the ultimate picture of happiness. And I'm sharing this from some notes that I took this weekend from, and I want to give credit to JP Moreland just for just the incredible way he uh broke down this scripture, and I want to share some of that with you. Ready? So if you got your Bible, let me um pop this up here. If you got your Bible, I want you to turn to here we go. Now, last week we ended with this scripture. Just as we've been born in the image of the man of dust, we shall also bear the image of the man of heaven, and that's Christ. And hey, way to go, Ray. It is hard work. Marriage is for adults, one of my friends said, absolutely. And you know, part of you know, part of uh living the life that Christ is is called for is not easy. It's not, well, God's gonna bless you, and now that you've received Christ, your sins are forgiven, life is perfect, you don't suffer again. No, uncreate, you know, that's not true. What's really true is the difference between you before you meet Christ in a born again, and after, before you didn't have him to be with you, with him, you have him in your life, and you have his power, even in the midst of the hard things that we go to. And so God's image for you and for me is that even though we've been born in the image of the man of dust, right? And that's Adam, we shall bear the image of the man in heaven. That's way too small for for some of you to see. So let me pop it this way. Here we go. And so I'm still trying to learn how to use this other format here, and let's try this, okay? All right, and so turn with me in your Bible to Matthew 16, 24. You have your Bible, turn to Matthew 16, 24. We're gonna learn these verses, and Jesus is giving the answer to a life well lived. You ready? It says, So for what profit what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? What will it profit him? Or what shall man give in return for his soul? For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels and the glory of his father, and then he will look at this, repay each person according to what he has done. You know, when you follow Christ and you're born again in the midst of those hard moments of being a dad, one of the most amazing things is that everything you do in Christ, every sacrifice you make, every late night bottle feeding you get up, every time you bless an enemy, every time you ask for forgiveness, every time you show up as a dad, God is watching, he's recording. Imagine, you know, if you know, and so what's that called? It's that live your life in such a way that God has a highlight film of your life. Because that's what He's gonna show. We're gonna be rewarded. That's what that scripture says, right? It it says that uh we're gonna be rewarded. I'm still trying to learn. Here we go. For what profits a man's first son will is gonna come with his angels one day in the glory of his father, and he will repay each person according to what he has done. That's God's promise for you. That's God's promise for me. You might you might think that your life really doesn't isn't making much of a difference, but God sees all of this. God sees the sacrifice that you're living in. He he sees what you're going through, but he watches how you handle yourself, how you obey him when you don't feel it, when you you forgive, when you bless, when you do good to somebody who deserves a punch in the nose. God's watching what you're doing in your life, and he's recording everything to bless you and reward you in your life. And so, in other words, what you do really does matter. It really matters. And you might think that you're all by yourself in your own world, and you're being challenged on the edge of your life, and it's a really hard struggle right now. God is watching you and He is recording all those moments. You turn to Scripture and you turn to Him and you do what He's asking you to do, even when you don't feel it. That's that's living by faith. You've been talking a lot about faith in these last months together. It's doing what you you don't feel, it's being faithful. You know, the the promise of you know, of some in the church is that you know, we're gonna get filled with the Spirit and walk around in 24-hour day supernatural power. That just doesn't happen. And I remember what John Wimber used to say the problem is that we leak. And we'll be anointed that at one time and God really using us, and and at other time we're you know, we're we're pushing back our flesh who wants to dominate our heart and discourage us and to make us feel like we're really not making a difference. And I I want to speak to those dads out there, and you're in the game, you got the jersey on, you might it might be ripped, you might have been blitzed by the by the culture and pressed back, and but man, you matter to God, he saved you, and the promise of that scripture, you know, the promise of that scripture is that you know, when when you really get that he's gonna repay each person according to what he's done, what a promise that is for you if you're in Christ. Those who live in the world and have nothing, it's like they they're really isn't that the the sweet that was the sweet spot of Jesus. He lived for the pleasure of his father, and to do what his father was asking to do, no matter how hard it was. And to save us, he had to carry the cross to his death and die a death, and and was raised from the dead. This verse goes on, and and so hold on here. Let me let me let me go back here. No, and so let me go back here. And so part of this is and kind of the point of of sharing with you about how hard it's been for you is that I just I just want to say to you it's worth it. It's worth the struggle, it's worth those times where you're completely unseen and you don't think that what you're doing really does matter. But it does matter. You know, it's in in my background there. I have two things that mean a lot to me. One is my my dad's flag. He was a test pride in a Navy. He was killed in action. And every time I go online, I see that flag, and it just reminds me of the way he lived his life. He was all out testing Fury 3 jets to push them to the limit so that pilot not so many pilots would die in combat. They have all the planes today because of men like my father who pushed it. And he lived in he modeled a life for me as son to take the gifts and all the things that God's given me and to give them back. To give them back to God with all that I have. And I'm going to tell you, to do those things, there's suffering. Sometimes it's your family against you. Sometimes it's people that are against you. Sometimes you just feel all alone, like you don't matter. But there's this place where you've got to kind of press through the pressure and the pain because you're doing it for a different reason than people in the world who want happiness, which is the pleasure of the moment. And the ultimate giving yourself away to is to the Lord, to the gifts that He's giving you. And so we can hide those gifts or we can use those gifts, but it's hard work. I would just love, you know, God to, you know, I remember when I was pastoring, and boy, we prayed for revival. And we we had a short season of a couple of months where we saw rapid growth and we knew it was the Lord. And boy, we tried to do everything to keep it going. But there was a moment, and it was just like just everything was easy. But to get to that moment, there was a lot of prayer, there was a lot of faithfulness, there was a lot of hiddenness, there was a lot of things that nobody saw. And you you've had that too. And because the God who sees in secret will reward publicly one day in heaven. And it's really easy for you and I to get discouraged because of how hard things are. Because, hey, loving a girl, for instance, loving a wife for a lifetime is an impossible thing for you as a man, unless God helped you. Being a great father, being present in your kids' life over a lifetime. Boy, it's hard. There are times when your kids are looking you funny. They don't want to hear a thing you have to say. And there's and there's a place that I've learned because one of the things that I do is um I'm an I'm an art, I'm an oil painter, a plain air painter. I paint outside and and do that. There's there's something that you learn when you're an artist. It's the same as a writer of doing anything that's beyond your natural ability, where you have to rely on God. There's pain there. There's hardship there. And you can't give up when it's not flowing, because everybody wants the the sweet spot. They want the spring of life where everything in your life is great, everything's growing. Romance with your wife is great, everything's it's it's awesome, and then all of a sudden you hit the winter, and there's not many flowers anymore. The it's cold, you might be under some big snow right now in different parts of the world, and so that you just, you know, you're just like, oh, the winter, the snow, the this the chains on your wheels, and but you know, spring is coming. And God's given you all those seasons in your life, and his promise is I'm gonna be with you, no matter how hard it gets. Maybe you need a breakthrough in your marriage, you need a breakthrough in healing, you need a breakthrough in life, maybe you need a breakthrough with your children. You know, what God is after in you is not that you become this water walking disciple of his, but you just be a son that shows up every day and follows. The secret of living this life of when you have incredible pressure on you, is that you follow. You follow Jesus. You follow what the Father wants you to do in your life. You're asking questions all the time. What do you want me to do? You know, what do you want me to say? Maybe your marriage is is hurting right now. And so part of the process is learning how to step back from the battle and say, Lord, show me how to do this. And this the secret, you know, you know, the the great quote from the from a past president that talks about that, you know, the secret is the man who's actually in the arena, whose face is marred by sweat and blood, who who airs valiantly. He you you got mistakes in your life, but there's this sense that you just don't give up. And and I wanted to do a teaching tonight to some of you guys who felt like you're all alone. You feel like you're counted out. And you know, I I've learned to measure my walk with Jesus not based on all the breakthroughs that I get, but based on what it takes to get me to quit. And by hanging in there, because I think that's how God measures us. I think he rewards us, he's waiting for us to just hang in there. To pray when our we feel like our prayers are bouncing off the ceiling, to read the Bible when it's not like giving us goosebumps, to just that just this normal, unanointed life that we all have. And in those times, you're waiting, and then if you hang in there, you don't run away from it. Gotta break through in moments that will just absolutely blow your mind. I had one of those the other day, and I've been doing a lot to get ready for an art show here coming up, and I've been writing, and there's a lot of stuff we're doing in our ministry. We're growing and reaching more people. And there's times when I just was incredibly discouraged. I kind of woke up that way. You ever wake up that way?

SPEAKER_01 30:10

Well, you're just like, God, when you when is the promise going to be fulfilled? And one thing I've learned in the midst of God's answer, it's it's Christ in us, the hope of glory.

SPEAKER_02 30:25

Because we become more like Christ through the suffering, through trusting Him. But I was just like feeling like, you know, I just maybe God's done using me, and I got not much to do, and and so I go to the front door and somebody knocks on my door.

SPEAKER_01 30:48

And it's somebody I recognize.

Jesus’ Antidote In Matthew 16

SPEAKER_02 30:53

And I said, Hey, hey Julio, he's a a Mexican friend who's he's got an incredible tree business. He's he can climb up there like a monkey, and just you know, I can't go up there. Those branches would break. I'd fall, the San Andreas fault would crack, and thousands of homes would go into the sea. Anyway, and suddenly I said, Hey, Julio, how are you? And he goes, Good. I said, and I just I was just dulling the door now. I didn't really see the tears in his eyes because I he I guess he had been crying on the way over, and he goes, You remember me? And I said, Well, yeah, you you want some work? He said, No. You told me that I'm re when I'm ready to receive Jesus to come knock on your door.

SPEAKER_01 31:59

Oh man. And I just I prayed with him. Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_02 32:09

And the Spirit of God falls on him and he starts sobbing as God's forgiveness begins to wash over him like this gentle stream began to restore a man who's felt so guilty for so much of his life.

SPEAKER_01 32:32

And I got to be there to see it. I get to partner with God. See, what God has for us is these moments.

SPEAKER_02 32:44

We just hang in there and we don't run away. Maybe you've been running away, maybe you're not in church right now, maybe you you feel stuck. But I gotta tell you, if you'll hang in there, and just trust that God can see way farther than you. And I'm gonna show one more example. I was on a special trip with my wife in Colorado, and we're in Uray. It's a beautiful, beautiful town. The most like Switzerland in the United States. And we're having a little, we we call them mini moons. We go and hang out. I did some ministry there. And so we have to go down to Durango, and we have to go down the backside of the mountain, and it was it was snowing, and it was a whiteout, and it's a sheer cliff all the way down. You barely see the street signs, and I just felt stuck. And it was scary. I knew that we could just go over the edge and we'd be gone. Then we'd probably find us for days. And I just thought I said, God, what do I do? Because I can't go, I can't turn around because there's no turnaround to go back up to Ure Uray. And so I I opened my window. He said, just follow the line. And I opened my window and I looked down, and there was the faint line on the road that was still showing. And I just drove my car like a granny to down the hill, watching that line, and just stayed there. You know, and the Bible, the Bible says, your word, Lord, is like a lamp unto my feet. You know, we we talk about the light of the Lord being a lamp unto our feet, a a light to our path. And I I I looked up that word, a lamp unto my feet. And it and it and it's talking not about a spotlight or the brand new LED light, or one of those flashlights that you can that just goes for miles.

SPEAKER_01 35:19

He's talking about a candle what like a flame on a candle.

Don’t Quit: Stories Of Breakthrough

SPEAKER_02 35:29

And it's like your word is a lamp unto my feet. And in other words, it it's only light enough to for you to take a step. Because we want the predictable journey where we can see God's plan for us for years down the road, so it removes risk. But no, he gives us just that little line of scripture every day, like the white line on that road from Ure all the way down the mountain there to Durango. And by the way, my my face, when I brought it back in the car, my wife's laughing because it's covered with snow. I look like Frosty the snowman, and it was freezing, but it kept me awake as I'm watching these things. And the faithful living out of God's word every single day not only changes the way we see ourselves, but it keeps us in there and prepares us for what he's got for us. So don't be discouraged. God's with you because Christ is in you and he wants to bless your life in profound ways. Amen. So grateful you join us every week, no matter where you come from. Love your questions that you send to me. There's a number of assets that we have on our website that we love to bless you with. But uh right now, I just want to pray for you. You can go to my website at thefatherdifference.com. And maybe maybe you're interested in our online academy. And so go to my website at thefatherdifference.com, and we got a free devotional there. You can sign up for that. If you want to get a hold of me, you got a prayer request. You can email me at tanny at the fatherdifference.com. And we're we're here to help you live out the story that God has made you for. And so all that um is a prayer. I want to pray for you. And there's a short video that we kind of close with that uh would be a blessing if you watch that. So, Father, I just uh thank you for my brother that are watching and the life they have. I pray you would be with them and fill them and encourage them, Lord, especially when they feel overwhelmed by all this going on in the world today, what's going on in their life, their family, their children. I pray, Lord, that you would pull them out of the of the den of discouragement, Lord, and just set them on the rock of your word. That you'd speak to them, you'd minister to them, you give them hope. I pray you would bless them in a profound way. And I ask you, Lord, to you know, break any discouragement they have and set them free to just pay attention to your leading them heartbeat by heartbeat, and following you. That's that's enough for you. Jesus, you never know. It's not recorded, you never ran to the next city. You weren't in a hurry. You just were following the Father everywhere, and Lord teach us how to do that more. So we give you tonight and all of our prayer requests. Bless my brothers' families and all that's in front of them, and give them a breakthrough in the name of Jesus. And all God's men said, Amen. If you got prayer, you can email me and uh check out this closing video here. I'm praying for you.

SPEAKER_00 39:42

If you've enjoyed what you've seen and heard today, and you want to know more about how to be the husband and father your family really needs, please go to thefatherdifference.com and click on the Fatherhood Academy and sign up today. It only takes one loving father to change the course of generations and one perfectly heavenly father to begin the process. May God bless you, and we look forward to seeing you in the Fatherhood Academy.